just being real

i really appreciate real people. you know-the kind that understand-and if they don't, they just listen. it's a battle sometimes for me to be real, i want to have it together or know what to say-but i've noticed that if i don't, then i wasn't supposed to...
i wasn't meant to be here at any other time, i wasn't meant to be someone else. I was supposed to be right here, exactly how i am, at this very minute. this very day has been in His plan, no matter what choices i make or have made-it was all for this very purpose. i pray i can keep this realization of who God's made me.
sometimes i get scared of what lies ahead. i get scared that i won't succeed-i won't land a job that i really want-that labor will be too hard, or that i'm not loving enough to my husband or daughter...
but if i choose to turn my eyes off that initial fear and remember that i'm here because God's placed me here, and no one else-just me....it gives me the confidence to trust in His ways...it brings a sense of peace that even if i look at a failure, i can see it in a healthy way and not a destructive one. I can see a success in a humble way, not a prideful one.
i can love better....