Friday, February 29, 2008

Seeds of Forgiveness

Why is it so hard to forgive? I'm not talking about someone cutting you off. That's pretty easy after a few minutes. After you say to yourself, "ok, maybe they didn't see me" or "ok I've done that before". Just like God asks us to do, remember that we all fall short of the glory, we all have sinned. That's where Jesus got, "if a man wrongs you, turn the other cheek".
I'm having a real hard time with this situation. All of the people that hold me accountable of my actions and words, have reassurred me that God's got a huge hold on this situation, and even though we gave the other person involved a chance to admit he was lying and brought me into a horrible situation, and he still denied any knowledge that he knew, that GOD's GOT IT. I know i should believe in all my heart and forgive him, it's just so hard. We didn't want him to necessary fix everything, we just wanted him to confess that he did know. That's it.
On top of feeling this incredible amount of flesh coming out of me, and feeling the seeds of bitterness plant away, it's taking my spirit and eating it. it's effecting my and gary's relationship with God. it's such a hinderance. but i have to thank the lord that he's given me the opportunity to test my faith in him, right!?
I can't judge him, I don't know what God's doing in his heart, but it just really gets under my skin. 36 pages of evidence and still won't admit to it. He was not sincere in the least....
My flesh wants to take him to court for wronging us. Jesus is way against that. Jesus would never want two believers to have it come to that.
So Lord, remind me of who I can be if led by my flesh. Lord, please, please help me to stop watering the seeds of unforgiveness, and start planting seeds of love and forgiveness over this person's life. Lord, I want the best for him and pray your bless his life abundantly.


sammie said...

Rach, literally take some seeds and plant them just for the visual.
Hey my cousin Jeff and his wife, the ones that go to Africa and everywhere to do mission work. She is a nurse practisioner and Jeff is a carpender and a youth pastor. Jeff and Becky are my age, and God just called them to start a church in the poorest section of the state they live in. Its like murders and he told me last week a 3 year old was raped. Its bad. But God is blessing there work and they now have 65 members. He said he just kept hereing God say Jeff you need to do this, so he just took his money and did it. Yesterday he said someone gave him a bus for 650. that is a whole school bus. we sere just giggling about how God will just use you till you drop if you let Him.

sammie said...

OK, I'm addicted: White lines & red lights but especially The way she feels.