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Wednesday, January 25, 2006

ahhhhh

this is the first time when i've fasted, that i actually felt like i was going to pass out. it hit me as early as this morning at around 9 am. my morning started off HORRIBLE, i totally overslept. I passed out last night around 9:30....i think i've been so tired because of the hurry hurry rush rush "theme" of the week. I really haven't had time to breathe. After school yesterday, i decided to time myself on my run to see my improvements for the 15k coming up. I ran 5.5 miles in 50 minutes. I'm getting better. I totally didn't want to run, but once i got started, God gave me so much energy! It left me quickly, because around 7 i was shot. I think that's why i overslept this morning. I'm going to fast until tonight, eat some, and then daniel diet thursday to prepare me for the long weekend of fasting (Friday-Sunday). I think God's telling me to slow down by not giving me any energy.
my class did pull through today on another life lesson God's been trying to get me to listen to....PATIENCE! After getting a little dizzy, and doing morning work with them on the board, an idea came to my head...I was going to tell the class that I was not going to raise my voice above a certain level, i would just stand there and wait until they were ready to listen. Now, mind you, i've said things like that in the past, and never followed through. I asked the class if they had faith in me (them not knowing i really really couldn't raise my voice do to a lack of energy) and they all did. I then asked if they had faith in themselves to not get out of control (like yesterday) and they agreed they could. the kids asked me why i was doing that, and i told them I prayed to God last night asking him to help me not to raise my voice and to give me patience with the class. I didn't ask Him to have you guys behave, just to help me with how i dealt with the kids....and then i told them I woke up this morning with no energy, a sore throat, and weakness from not having chocolate and there was no way i could raise my voice! they looked at me in SHOCK! BUT GUESS WHAT? i haven't had to raise my voice at all! we've had the most pleasant morning! Its lunch time now, and i'm keeping myself busy, GOD I PRAY that i can keep this patience thing up for the rest of the day. The afternoons are the hardest. I just want to crawl up into a ball and sleep! I'm so tired. I have to rush out of class so i can get up to Jax and get some stuff done with Jen b4 church. I have a feeling church is going to be absolutely amazing. Its been real hard for me to focus today, so i'm praying that it all comes together by the time church starts....
tristan also came up to me today...he looked extremely stressed. I asked him what was wrong and he told me he had two relatives in the hospital who were really ill. After he finished i asked him if he wanted me to pray for them, and his eyes lit up and he smiled....i gave him a hug, and told him it was all going to be fine, GOD will take care of it. He wanted me to pray for them! He just was afraid to ask. God, you are so good. I LOVE U.

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